Day 2 of my Transformation or at least writing about it.

So Today was a long day at work, I barely got any sleep as I was up last night for hours trying to get the blog and the first entry set up. So I was tired all day long. Luckily it was a very easy day. Nothing happened really a couple of walk in problems fixed immediately but thats it. I had a lot of time to think and fall asleep at my desk. I should try not to do that one though.

So, What did I learn today?

I learned that worrying about thing is a trait that does not suit me, not in the least bit. I learned that all it does is make me very emotional. Worrying about an answer that hasn't been even given is the worst. Yet I do it all the time, and no matter what it is I am always living afterwards, so why worry? life will only through at me what I can handle, thats all it ever through's at us. But then you wonder, what about those guys on the street, why couldn't they handle it. Well truth is they could have and as much as they have nothing now and struggle for a meal, you could say they took the easy way out. you see they have nothing else to worry about, they only need to think of themselves. They have no bills, no responsibility, nothing.

So, I decided that from now on I am going to deal in fact of what is and not what if's. When the time comes for me to know something then that when I will know. dont get me wrong I am not saying dont prepare or anything of that sort and if you can get an answer then by all means get one, but if you cant get an answer to something now, and you must wait. Well then wait, live your life, and let things take their course.

So, what exactly does this have to do with me? Well Nali told me today she had something to tell me, but then we both got busy and she never got a chance to tell me what it was. I immediately thought the worst things. it could be, and though about her. And feeling emerged to make me sad, or angry, or jealous, not good feeling but bad ones. and thats when I noticed this isnt healthy and I am going to hurt someone in the crossfire if I keep thinking about these things cause I am just going to get angry and lash out at the innocent by-standard.

So did I learn anything else today? Yeah I learned that I have a long road ahead of me with many obstacles, but I also learned that I am not just taking a scenic route and trying to find myself with time, and just letting it come my way, instead I am sprinting through El Yunque of my life, to the real spotlights of it. Because like I said I am not just letting tame do it, I am consciously looking at myself and finding my flaws and fixing them. So that I may be a better [person tomorrow and not in some distant future. That is why I picked this photo today. Because I know I have a long Journey ahead but it is not going to discourage me just cause its a long one, and I am not going to slow down either. Change needs to happen now!